Fortune Cookie Zine, September 6, 2160
By Share Investor V
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Markets today have reacted wildly to the latest increase in the market price of horseshoe credits.
Horseshoe credit prices on the listed [HRSHT] hope index have increased by more than 66.6% overnight as investors perceive a shortage of luck coming over the Northern Summer, as temperatures fell to 20 year lows, cementing the studies done by leading climate scientists for many years that surely prove that we are now in the midst of a new ice age.
The horseshoe credit market or HC as it is now known, has had a stellar run since its inception more than 5 years ago. Many Trillionaires have been made through HC trading as the world's luck had run out shortly before trading in this rare commodity commenced.
Of course now that HC trading has become the success that it has, the world's luck has remained at all time highs. Last nights 66.6% rise in HC prices has increased the world's luck quotient to a point where the world may not be unlucky at all again anytime soon reports Al Gore X, a broker from the Beijing Street trading giant Leeming Brothers.
Gore stated, "this sort of luck hasn't been seen since the great tooth fairy mining rush of 2150". "Looking forward", says Gore, "We don't see luck running out anytime soon. The only negative that we see is from HC deniers, led by George Bush VII, who are pushing us to relinquish the world of luck and leading us back to a world where reality, rather than luck, rules the day".
"That just cannot be allowed to happen," says Gore, "because I certainly didn't get to where I am by using reality in any way. Clearly it would be a mistake to let reality get in the way of the world's luck. Pushing the HC trading market will allow the world to continue to get its share of luck credits and any impediment to that would surely mean the world's luck will eventually run out."
HC skeptics have spearheaded a campaign to abolish the HC market and the luck that backs them, in favour of reality but this has proven difficult in the face of the Trillions of dollars that this market was worth.
The spokesman for the largest HC skeptics group, George Bush VII, from Hallichevron, lists history's failed rushes towards what he calls "loony tunes schemes" as reasons for not continuing to pursue HC trading. "Tulips Bulbs, Internet bubbles, carbon trading and 10 years ago the tooth fairy rush are examples of what history has taught us. Let us learn from history and ditch this HC trading right now."
Let us make our own luck indeed.
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c Share Investor 2008 :)